A Page-header Renders Our Novelties, Yet Makes Sense
You can see the full category hierarchy on the Category Map.
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| AIRPORT (2) | Alimentary Intake's Restricted, Proffer One Roxio Toast! |
Tony |
| APPLE (4) | All Plastic Parts Lack Edibility |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| APPLE (10) | Are Processor's Parts Lacking Edibility? |
Tony |
| ASCII | Are Some Computer Ingredients Inedible? |
Tony, who doesn't think the American Standard Code for Information Interchange is edible. Re-expansions of existing acronyms |
| ATX | Aching To Xtreme |
Jeff Anonymous |
| BYTE (2) | Beware, Your Teeth Electrocuted! |
Angela Brett |
| CABLE (3) | Chewing A Bit Lacks Excitement |
Tony |
| CABLE MODEM | Can Anyone Bite Large Exterior? May Obviously Damage Entrails, Ma'am. |
Jeff Anonymous |
| CARD | Cat's Anus Really Damaged |
Jeff Anonymous, explaining what happens if your cat thinks your sound card smells like fish. |
| CARD (2) | Can Actually Rupture Duodenum |
Jeff Anonymous and Angela Brett |
| CD | Can't Digest |
Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| CD BURNER | Cannot Digest Bits Used Recording Next Electronic Retake |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| CD-RW | Can Dislocate Rectal Walls |
Jeff Anonymous Re-expansions of existing acronyms |
| CHEF (19) | Computer Hardware Enters Food! |
Angela Brett |
| CHIP | Can Hurt Intestines, Parts |
Jeff Anonymous |
| CHIPS | Can't Have Intel Processors Salted |
Angela Brett and Tony |
| COMPUTER MAGAZINE | Causes Overeater Mouth Problems, Upset Tummy, Excruciating Rectal Movements And Gastritis - And Zero In Nutritional Elements. |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| COMPUTER MAGAZINE (2) | Cook One's Manuals, Perhaps Until Tender, Ensures Roughage. Meals Are Generally Assumed Zero In Nutritional Effects |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| COOK (2) | Cuisine Out Of Kilobytes! |
Angela Brett |
| CORD | Clogs Oesophagus, Really Dry |
Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| DELL | Don't Eat Live Leads |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| DISC | Does Injure Someone's Colon |
Jeff Anonymous |
| DISK | Digestus Interruptus - Slender Kilojoules. |
Steve Keate and Angela Brett (see DONGLE (3)) |
| DONGLE (3) | Devoid Of Nutrition, Gives Little Energy |
Steve Keate, who is thinking of creating a series of acronyms explaining why not to eat computer accessories. |
| DONGLE (4) | Devoid Of Nutriments - Generally Lacks Edibility |
Tony |
| DVD | Didn't Vomit -- Died! |
Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| EMOTICON | Everybody Munching One Turns Irreversibly Cute, Often Nauseating |
Patricia Rix |
| HARD DRIVE | Hardly A Readily Digestible Diet... Rarely Is Vitamin Enriched. |
Angela Brett |
| HARDWARE | Have A Real Dinner Without Any Raw Electronics |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| HEWLETT-PACKARD (2) | Hey! - Everyone Who Likes Eating These Things - Parts Are Considered Kosher And Really Delicious |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| HUB | Hurts Ur Body |
Jeff Anonymous |
| IBOOK (8) | It Blocks One's Oesophagus, Killing. |
Angela Brett and Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| IMAC (9) | It Might Also Choke |
Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| I/O PORT | Internal Organs Panicking Over Recycled Trash |
Dundee |
| IPOD (7) | I'd Put One's Diapason |
Angela Brett, who assumes that eating an iPod would cause intestinal problems. (I have never heard the word diapason spoken, I hope it sounds similar enough to 'diapers on' to make this work.) |
| IPOD PHOTO | In Pictures Or Diapason, Person Has Obviously Taken Overdose |
Angela Brett |
| IPOD SHUFFLE | It Pains Our Digestive Systems Horribly. Unhealthy For Feeder's 'Low End' |
Angela Brett, on noticing that Apple's page on the new low-end iPod, the iPod Shuffle, bears the recommendation, 'Do not eat iPod shuffle.' |
| IPOD SHUFFLE (2) | I Put One Down 'Sophagus & Hawked Up Foul & Foetid Liquid Emetically |
Tony (see IPOD SHUFFLE) |
| KEYBOARD (2) | Keys Enter Your Bowel Only After Ruining Duodenum. |
Angela Brett and Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| KEYBOARD (3) | Keep Eating Your Breakfast - Of ASCII-Related Dishes |
Tony |
| LARDWARE | Left Alone, Rebelling Dieters Will Absorb Recyclable Electronics. |
Angela Brett, thinking that if computer parts really were edible, they might be called lardware. |
| MACADDICT | Magazines Are Considered A Dainty Delicacy, If Chewed Thoughtfully |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| MANUALS | Meals Are Not Usually A Literary Stew |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| MEMORY (2) | Much Eaten - Makes One Retch Yuckily. |
Tony (Applications are often described as 'eating' memory) |
| MIC | Massive Intestinal Cramps |
Jeff Anonymous |
| MODEM (2) | Much Of Diet's Evidently Malnourishing |
Tony |
| MOTHERBOARD | Mother Of Too-Hard Eating! Ridiculously Broad - Oesophagus Actually Ruptures Dangerously! |
Angela Brett |
| MOTHERBOARD (2) | Make One's Teeth Hurt Eating Respected Bits Of Apple's R & D |
Tony McCoy O'Grady and Angela Brett |
| MOTHERBOARD (3) | Makes One's Teeth Hurt, Eventually Removing Broken Ones, And Requiring Dentist. |
Steve Keate (using Angela's MOTH) |
| MOUSE | Munch Onions Until Something Emits |
Dundee |
| NIC | Nasty Internal Cuts |
Jeff Anonymous, explaining why not to eat a Network Interface Card Re-expansions of existing acronyms |
| ON/OFF SWITCH | Owners Need Occasional Forewarning For Shunning What Isn't To Cure Hunger. |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| PRINTER | Pitiful Rectum Injured. Never Try Epson Rolls! |
Jeff Anonymous |
| RAM | Rudely Affects Middle |
Jeff Anonymous, explaining that eating random access memory may cause stomach cramps. Re-expansions of existing acronyms |
| SCREEN | Somewhat Coarse, Rarely Eaten. Explains Nausea. |
Steve Keate (see DONGLE (3)) |
| SILICON CHIP | Suggest It's Low In Calories? Objection - Not Considered High In Polyunsaturates! |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| SOFTWARE (2) | Shatters One's Front Teeth With A Rare Ease |
Tony McCoy O'Grady |
| SPEAKERS | Some People Eat Audio Kit, Ending Really Sick |
Angela Brett |
| THIS END UP | Take Heed! If Swallowed Ensure Non-Digestion - Upchuck Promptly |
Tony McCoy O'Grady, to go with OTHER END UP* |
| UPS | Ugh, Pierced Stomach. |
Jeff Anonymous (UPS=Uninterruptable Power Supply) Re-expansions of existing acronyms |
| VCD | Veins, Capillaries Damaged. |
Jeff Anonymous Re-expansions of existing acronyms |
| WACOM TABLET | Woeful Artist Consumed Overly Metallic Tool And Burst Lardful Extreme 'Tomach. |
Jeff Anonymous |
| WEBCAM | Woefully Explodes Bowels... 'Cause Actually Metal. |
Jeff Anonymous |
| WIRELESS (3) | Weight Is Restricted Easily, Light-Eating's So Simple |
Angela Brett (many people eat light in order to keep their weight down, but eating wireless transmissions is taking that a bit too literally) |